Writers Block

I don’t believe in myself yet.

I’m trying.

But, I keep falling back into versions of myself I can’t stand.

The indecisive nice guy who waits for permission to do something only he can give himself permission to do.

The swaggering asshole who doesn’t know what he wants but boasts around with how interesting he is.

The people I want to talk to I reject and the people I let in I dislike.

I can be charming.

I get lost in my head.

I guess I’ve been getting lost in my head more and more lately as I realize I need to start publishing again.

I need to inch closer to what it is I am trying to say.

Sigh…

I don’t really know what it is I want to say.

I’m so distracted by my life it’s hard to get back to the task I set myself.

To Refound this Nation and find a way forward.

I know the past is tempting, there is so much injustice and nonsense to dissect and amend for.

And we should, but I’m afraid if it’s just to get even we’re not gonna get anywhere.

We need to dare to be odd.

I’m not sure if Your my audience but if you’re reading I want you to know there is so much between the lines I can’t say yet.

Phew.

Me and my words again, it’s a scary prospect.

I’m Jefferson Thomas, and I think we’re being led astray.

Who are our leaders these days? A bunch of people who are too old to enjoy the sun they wrought. The glaciers are leaving, and the forests are fuming.

Maybe it’s just me, but I feel more alone than ever in this interconnected world of ours.

I don’t know how to talk to any of y’all. It feels like a bunch of meaningless chatter.

It’s all hows and whys and I am at the moment concerned with the what.

We the young are going to inherent this mess eventually.

We need to start formulating what we would like to do rather than continuing to blindly follow our myopic leaders.

Perhaps I am a pessimist or an idiot, and those are both charges I would except but I just can’t make heads or tales of why we all feel so powerless.

I suppose the first step is for me to find my own power, find my empathy again and finally find my words.

I can feel what I want to say, I just need to embrace the feeling.