Monday Morning Mourning Ep. 1
Dear United Americans,
I was born a privileged white dude so the world was my oyster; the world told me as such.
I was constantly told I could be anything I wanted, but the only Job that ever interested me as a child was to be President of the United States.
Surely that was too big of an ask, so I told the adults in the rooms I’d like to be the Vice-Administrator of Information Systems at NASA because I was a smart-ass and that sounded like an intelligent job to me.
That lie started a laziness I masked from myself.
Always in the back of my mind I thought to myself that at some point I would show the world that I was qualified to be President of the United States of America.
“Eventually, I’ll actually build up the skill set necessary to deserve Your trust in my occupancy of Your Ovalest of Offices.”
But I never did much of anything to make that a reality. Yet the dream persisted in my mind because of my excuses.
I didn’t need to be honor student because George W. Bush was a C student and he still managed to get into that White-ass House.
Barack Obama smoked weed so I figured I should start too and it’s smokey whispers gave me permission to slack off and party in college.
It’s alright that I am crass and uncouth because after all . . . Donald Trump.
And so my self doubt became stronger because I did nothing to build confidence in the future I wanted for myself. All I did was give myself permission to be indolent while still entertaining an increasingly ludicrous daydream for myself.
Every year becoming President of the United States of America sounded more and more far-fetched to my own mind because at some point I realized I was completely unqualified and often morally corrupt for the sake of argument.
I still need to read most of Classical Literature because the cliffnotes are proving insufficient in actually intelligent conversationⓇ [Non-Sponsored by Clubhouse].
Then,
This morning I had a notion.
Nobody is qualified to be President of the United States. It’s a job with too many dictums for a single person.
Now I feel a whole lot better.
I’m not qualified to be President of the United States not only because I am an outrageous slacker but because nobody is competently qualified to be President of the United States in 2024. There just isn’t enough time in a life to learn all the necessary skills.
Anyway, this morning I’d like to mourn my self-doubt.
I am going to be the next President of the Untied States of America, unfortunately.
There’s nothing You can do about it, I merely tell you now because it’s inevitable. And it will be a lot easier if Y’all go along with it peacefully.
Sincerely,
JTF
D.C.